i cried when i heard about it on the news today. kind of unsure why. it's not like i'm not used to having a majority of my fellow americans vote that i'm undeserving of one of the most basic civil rights. that happened a year ago in my own state, in full force, with yes on 102 yes there is something wrong with you yes your love is undeserving of protections everyone else's is taunting me everywhere i looked -- and i mean everywhere (tv, radio, internet, stickers everywhere on my college campus, "enlightened" bigots telling me i chose this, signs in my neighbors' yards, billboards, doorhangers on the front door of my house) -- hate everywhere.

and so even though i'm used to this happening.. every time it happens again i'm hurt. i don't want to be. i've turned this issue over and over in my head for years. i understand both sides. i try not to take it personally that in every state where marriage equality has been up for public vote, a majority of the people have struck it down. The states that recognize marriage equality or civil unions (which are NOT equal, but better than nothing) do so not because of a public vote but because of government legislation.

what is wrong with people? why is my private life up for public vote? and why do people feel they have the right to vote on it in the first place? it hurts. every time this happens, it hurts. people who vote against gay marriage hurt me personally, and i have no respect for them or their opinions at all. and i can't wait until they die because then they won't be around to shove their bigotry down my throat.

bitter? yes. i am. with good reason. and i'm not looking to start a re-blogging debate, so if you do wish to argue with me you do so in vain. it won't happen. i wrote this to vent, and i won't change my mind.

it's beautiful and it's sad. the support is wonderful. but it's sad that it's even an issue, that my private life is up for public vote.. anyway, i wish i could have been there today. happy national coming out day. i wasn't even there and i'm moved by how epic the march must have been.




kristin chenoweth ^




lady gaga ^

(pics from autostraddle)

Idina made a list of her favorite sad songs and I wanted to make a list of mine. Sad songs do say so much.

01. Forever - Idina Menzel
02. Iris - Goo Goo Dolls
03. Colors - Amos Lee
04. Teeth - Lisa Hannigan
05. Blower's Daughter - Damien Rice
06. Something - Carey Brothers
07. Fix You - Coldplay
08. I'll Cover You (Reprise) - RENT
09. Finale - Wicked

Instead of getting ready for summer school I was on facebook, reading a fellow LGBTQ activist's article bashing gay pride:

Article: Gay Pride Month: Where’s the Pride in Pride Parades?
The gay community has every right to claim its place in the civil rights struggle. But there was a reason Martin Luther King Jr. and Bayard Rustin wore suits. In a politically important moment for the gay community, thongs and theatrics don’t cut it.

My Response: The Civil Rights movement wasn't about pride it was about civil rights, and there's a difference between Pride parades and protest marches. At the LGBTQ protests I've been to we haven't been wearing suits like MLK, but we also haven't been wearing booty shorts or pasties or rainbow wings. Pride serves a different function than a protest. Yes, LGBTQ comm is representing itself all the time, Pride parades included, and I guess some would say it's important to maintain an image society deems as "wholesome" and then maybe just maybe we'll have marriage equality sooner...But that seems like a cop out. ( more... )

The opposition: Well, the Pride parade was originally a protest for the right to be out and be safe; now that sodomy is no longer illegal, the parade has lost sight of that a little. So, the article has a point. ( ...more )

My response: You're right that some aspects of Pride are very sexual, and I think that has to do with the fact that the LGBTQ community is more sexually liberal than other communities (obviously) but it also has to do with what you pointed out about who sponsored the parade and festival. ( ...more )

The opposition: It's not about being 'normal' or 'fitting in;' it's about being aware and responsible for the community AT LARGE. It's not necessarily about being 'accepted' by the hetero community either; ( ...more )

My response: Personally, I don't believe that sexuality and nudity should be hidden from children. Shrouding sex in mystery and forbidden-ness doesn't exactly work when it comes to preventing the spread of disease and unwanted pregnancy. ( ...more )

Oh, I love arguing! But I am still very surprised when people disagree with me...I think that's a weakness of mine.

Okay, just saying right here that I'm no movie review writer and it's kind of difficult for me to share all my thoughts on the movie without giving anything away, but there are no spoilers in what I'm about to write:

I'll assume that you already know the premise of Into Temptation -- Kristin Chenoweth as Linda, a suicidal prostitute who confesses that she will commit suicide to a catholic priest (Jeremy Sisto, who was sitting across the aisle from me in the theater!) The priest, John, becomes obsessed with preventing Linda from carrying out her plan.

The movie reminds me of an old-fashioned mystery movie set in the current time period as it follows John's quest to find Linda, what with the people he meets and the places he goes as he gathers clues about Linda and her whereabouts. My only complaint about the film is that I wish it had more Kristin! But I understand why it didn't: the audience's glimpses of Linda become longer and more in depth as John learns more about her. The movie is more centered around John, the temptation he faces (his ex-girlfriend returning) and his search for Linda, than it is centered around Linda and her temptation to kill herself.

Kristin's performance in the scenes she is in is phenomenal. I admittedly was a biased audience member as I already had a tremendous amount of respect for Kristin and her talent, but even I was blown away. I expected great, but what I got was beyond that. I expected Kristin to use her lower speaking register for this role, and expected not to hear much of the speaking voice we usually hear from her, but I was wrong. One of Linda's distinguishing characteristics is her distinctive speaking voice, so Kristin was perfect for the role. While I feared that her distinctive voice would take away from the seriousness of her lines (example: "My stepfather raped me when I was 12. I was 13 when I learned to like it") Kristin does an amazing job of delivering potent and heavy lines, in her higher register, in ways that are believable and moving. She proves, with this role, that she is not just some bubbly actress to be typecasted and forever bound to roles similar to those she played in Bewitched, RV, and Deck the Halls-type movies. She proves that she is not only an incredibly talented singer but an incredibly talented actress as well.

I was also blown away by how beautiful she is in this role. There are many close-ups of her face, often without makeup, and if you haven't seen this movie and already think she's gorgeous, wait until you see her up close on a huge screen without makeup. I felt I was seeing her as I never have before: completely natural, completely raw, and so completely beautiful. Every pore and every line of her face is visible and (I'm sure Kristin wouldn't be happy about this) she does, in fact, look her age in this film. But, in my opinion this is the most beautiful I've ever seen her.

And, I have a lot of other things to say concerning the ending of the movie (which I won't say here) as it is definitely an ending that I don't think anyone expects.

Overall the movie is very moving (so moving that it inspired one of the audience members to stand up and give a tearful monologue about loving your daughters so they don't end up like Linda.) Into Temptation the perfect amount of drama, suspense, and humor to make it poignant but not completely depressing, especially depending on how you interpret it (you'll understand what I mean by that once you see it -- or if you ask me and you want me to give it away, I guess I'd tell you anything you want to know. )

( Spoilers!!!!!!!!! The synopsis of the entire movie. SPOILER. )

Just when I didn't think I could possibly love Wicked or Kristin Chenoweth any more than I already do, they go and do more amazing things.
( Kristin on NPR )
( Defying Inequality )
( p p p poker face p p poker face! )

NYTimes — Same-sex couples will be allowed to marry in Iowa by month’s end, after a ruling on Friday by the Iowa Supreme Court that found unconstitutional a state law limiting marriage to a man and a woman.

Thank you! Other states, take note!

And...On a more.. bizarre note,

"I couldn't love Maddie more if she came out of my vagina."
- Kristin Chenoweth [source]

Bad, bad mental images, Kristin. Not cool.

Don't know why I'm engaging in this debate about whether gays should be allowed to have children or not, but I am. And I suppose I want to post it so that I can document that while I'm losing my mind, I'm still capable of making logical arguments and at least seeming like I'm lucid. (Plus, I want evidence of the conversation but I don't want to looking all junky on my tumblr.)

( Talking to closed-minded people is like talking to walls. )
PS -- I need to end this conversation now because I'm starting to sound like a bitch.

I suspect this game we play isn't healthy. (And I also suspect that it's all in my head.)

But if I wasn't looking for it, and I didn't expect to see it, and other people outside of us are noticing it, then it must exist, right?

Still, it's not healthy. (But I can't get enough.)

( I was going to )

Blake and I were listening to the German Wicked soundtrack and decided to plug some of the lyrics into the alta vista web page translator. We were very amused.

"Come fly with me the dreams after, together are we a superteam, we can fly, Glinda, over all borders," which is supposed to mean "Unlimited, together we're unlimited. Together we'll be the greatest team there's ever been, Glinda."

and

"As the felsblock says to the river, flow elsewhere! ... you were there, therefore I changed," which is supposed to mean "Like a stream that meets a boulder halfway through the wood ... because I knew you I have been changed for good."

I've been selected to lead a "breakout session" at a Women's Issues conference on "Being a Minority Woman in the 21st Century (Race, Sexuality and Gender)", and I have no idea where to begin =/

I had a thought about The Bluest Eye that (surprise, surprise) made me think of Idina.

There's a line where the little black girl is explaining why she doesn't like Shirley Temple because she dances with Bojangles (who is black), and she says "Bojangles was my friend. He was my brother and my father, and he should be dancing with me -- or at least, someone who looks like me."

( beauty )

http://www.tumblr.com/browse/tumblettes =)

draining my bank account. :( i'd better win the lottery.